any other way

AAAAAAGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH.
I need a very high mountain top right now, so I can go and pour out my soul to my Father. I suppose since it's raining, my room will have to do. But maybe I should go out in the rain.

I am so sorry, I never...I always thought...I'm sorry.
I'm angry. Angry at myself for not knowing myself very well.

What is gain? That we have all the attention our selfish hearts desire or that we live thoughtful lives endeavouring to serve others and build them up?

My mind is so full it feels like it's overflowing. I feel really stiff like if I move something worse will happen.

Here I thought I was mostly a good friend...I feel so plastic right now.

I am more hurt for my friends than hurt for myself. Myself I can deal with. My friends, well they have their own decisions to make and emotions to follow through on or not. We all have to choose for ourselves

Friends have always been important to me, it's a large part of the reason I love life. It let's me down then when I think I've abused that important part of my life.

I won't be perfect. Ever. But, I will change things, one step at a time. That's my promise and I have someone to keep me accountable.

If I had been faced any other way I'm fairly sure I'd be uber frustrated and angry right now.
It's a good thing we have people who know us well enough to know exactly how to face us with our lives. That is courage.

"No matter what though, we still love you and we'll give you as many chances as you need".

Oh God...

I'm sorry.
Please, let me try again.
I have some things to do and people I need to talk to.
I also have an idea, and I think it's a really good one.

I hope I love you the way you deserve it.

It's not about changing you, it's about changing what you do.