it's here

Okay, I finally reached that point. October hit, and so did the stress. Maybe it's because all of a sudden I had 3 more classes added to my term, which I did know were coming, but I wasn't exactly prepared. Maybe it's because I'm currently living without the presence and support of my parents (5 days to go!). Maybe it's because this morning I called my Grandma to tell her we were doing alright and she told me they were waiting for the ambulence to take my Grandad to the hospital, yet again, so she couldn't talk. Maybe it's because I have a million things to do (or feel like I do) and I have so many other things to do, I can't get those ones done. Maybe it's because I'm in the middle of a situation and I don't want to be here and I don't know how to get out without hurting anyone. Maybe it's because I miss people, a lot and I wish I could see them this second. Maybe it's because I'm now on top of the highschool world and everyone seems to expect more from you up here. Maybe it's because I'm annoyed with some things going on. Maybe it's because I'm feeling intensely pressured to drive. Maybe it's because I'm feeling distance. Maybe it's because I wish it was still summer. Maybe it's because I'm supposed to be deciding what I want to do next year. Maybe it's because my heart is aching over a variety of things and people. Maybe it's because everything is so different. Maybe it's because I'm so tired a lot of the time. Maybe it's because I kinda wish I had some more hours at work. Maybe it's because I'm not trusting God enough. Wait, that is actually probably it. I would get riled up like this. lol. The difference is? I've never been so happy and stressed out. I need to remember Psalm 46:10a.

I'm wearing my camp sweater, that always makes me feel better.
I'm going to the Rockton Fair on Friday, that's always rediculously fun.
I have a lot of people who are making sure I'm still breathing while my parents are away, and I appreciate it a lot.
I have a Almighty Heavenly Father. Thanks be to Him for life and for love.

Ahh, I'll get by.

PS. I'm trying to get a comments box through Haloscan, and I understand how to do it, but where the heck is the layout tab on the dashboard now. This shouldn't be difficult. I'm feeling mildly stupid. Such is life.