--/
Splintered again
How many more times
Will her heart be repairable?
Fighting so hard
How long will it be
Till he can run without hindrance?
Closed in so tight
Is anybody able
To get through to her?
On and on
Will he ever stop and look
Or will he keep breaking down?
His eyes stuck in her mind
Will she ever be able
To tell him "I love you"?
Knocked down
Will there be
A rescue for him?
All mixed up
Where in the world
Can she go, trust and spill it out?
Mesmerized from the first moment
Will there be an opportunity
For him to tell her she's beautiful?
They don't leave
Will these thoughts plaguing her
Ever beat a retreat?
So much pressure
Will the voices all around him
Finally cease to give an opinion?
We stand and then we fall
And then we stand again.
There is so much
life, surrounding life.
--/
(I just wrote this based on thoughts, things, events and people observed recently.)
Monday, July 27, 2009
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
EVERY
Because of the LORD's great love we are NOT consumed,
for His compassions NEVER fail.
They are NEW every morning;
great is your faithfulness.
Lamentations 3:22-23
Yes, oh yes...sigh
Monday, July 20, 2009
Gilbert loves Anne of Green Gables
...and I do too.
I am back!
Back from the wonderfully beautiful province of Prince Edward Island.
Population, 140,400 (or something very close to that)
I could totally be persuaded to live there. It's just so different then Ontario. There is this feeling of close knit community and everywhere you go you are bound to meet someone who you know. There is a good balence of farm country, villages, towns and cities. And almost everywhere you turn you can see ocean. Ah!
My family went to see Anne and Gilbert the Musical (the sequel to Anne of Green Gables) It was their love story. And I definitely love a good clean love story so I was hooked from the opening song. I enjoyed it so much and have the soundtrack to remember it for many more days.
We also went to Summerside and Charlottetown and for a coupel drives along the coasts. We even made it to one end of the island and I walked as far as could and stood on the very tip and felt accomplished.
I love Anne of Green Gables and her whole story quite a bit so it was a joy to see into her forgettably fictious world that L.M. Montgomery created for her. We went to "the house" and it was quite lovely.
We also did a fair bit of shopping. Kathleen will not be spending much money on things she does not need for a while. :P
Downers were the mosquitos (there were SO many) and the wind which blew all night long almost every night. AGH! I kind of got used to the wind and got to the point I could sleep all the way through.
On the Sunday we were there, we attended the United Reformed Church of PEI. It is a relatively new church plant. It is near Charlottetown and a family who we met at AOC this year go there. Currently they meet in a small Presbyterian church and therefore have slightly odd services times. There are currently about 9 full time families and it is the only URC church on the island (hence the name, I suppose!)
On the way there we spent a day in Quebec City. AH, it's so beautiful as well! Simons is one of the best stores in the world and I wish they would bring it to Ontario. They are ahead of the trends so the clothes you can buy there are not like all the other stores around. I like that.
All in all it was a good trip and we were able to see all of my mom's family along the way. Which really isn't that much, but I learn the importance of family more and more all the time.
Now I bide my time while I wait for 2 weeks to go by till Campfire which I am beyond stoked about for more than 1 reason...
I am back!
Back from the wonderfully beautiful province of Prince Edward Island.
Population, 140,400 (or something very close to that)
I could totally be persuaded to live there. It's just so different then Ontario. There is this feeling of close knit community and everywhere you go you are bound to meet someone who you know. There is a good balence of farm country, villages, towns and cities. And almost everywhere you turn you can see ocean. Ah!
My family went to see Anne and Gilbert the Musical (the sequel to Anne of Green Gables) It was their love story. And I definitely love a good clean love story so I was hooked from the opening song. I enjoyed it so much and have the soundtrack to remember it for many more days.
We also went to Summerside and Charlottetown and for a coupel drives along the coasts. We even made it to one end of the island and I walked as far as could and stood on the very tip and felt accomplished.
I love Anne of Green Gables and her whole story quite a bit so it was a joy to see into her forgettably fictious world that L.M. Montgomery created for her. We went to "the house" and it was quite lovely.
We also did a fair bit of shopping. Kathleen will not be spending much money on things she does not need for a while. :P
Downers were the mosquitos (there were SO many) and the wind which blew all night long almost every night. AGH! I kind of got used to the wind and got to the point I could sleep all the way through.
On the Sunday we were there, we attended the United Reformed Church of PEI. It is a relatively new church plant. It is near Charlottetown and a family who we met at AOC this year go there. Currently they meet in a small Presbyterian church and therefore have slightly odd services times. There are currently about 9 full time families and it is the only URC church on the island (hence the name, I suppose!)
On the way there we spent a day in Quebec City. AH, it's so beautiful as well! Simons is one of the best stores in the world and I wish they would bring it to Ontario. They are ahead of the trends so the clothes you can buy there are not like all the other stores around. I like that.
All in all it was a good trip and we were able to see all of my mom's family along the way. Which really isn't that much, but I learn the importance of family more and more all the time.
Now I bide my time while I wait for 2 weeks to go by till Campfire which I am beyond stoked about for more than 1 reason...
Sunday, June 28, 2009
when I see
Eyes are full of extraordinary beauty and light.
Especially some...
Some nights they are the last thing I can see in my minds eye before falling asleep.
Monday, June 22, 2009
split
Weird how one part of me is calm, cool, making progress, feeling accommplished and assured.
The other part is confused, cautious, freaking out and not even sure AT ALL.
Where is the split found in me?
That's a good question.
The other part is confused, cautious, freaking out and not even sure AT ALL.
Where is the split found in me?
That's a good question.
Friday, June 12, 2009
on the doorstep of...
18.
i stand.
ready.
alert.
wondering.
waiting.
thinking.
i looked at my hands and marveled that they are 18 years old and thought of the thousands of things they have done and the millions of things left to do.
this is going to be interesting.
i stand.
ready.
alert.
wondering.
waiting.
thinking.
i looked at my hands and marveled that they are 18 years old and thought of the thousands of things they have done and the millions of things left to do.
this is going to be interesting.
Monday, June 01, 2009
in all sincerity
Sometimes all I have to do/can do/want to do is say...
I'm sorry.
Just plain old sorry.
I'm sorry.
Just plain old sorry.
Monday, May 25, 2009
300 posts and 3 years
I can't believe it.
This is my 300th post and exactly 3 years of blogging (as of today).
Time.
Is.a.crazy.thing.
I am trying to feel better right now.
I am trying to get my head around what's happening with my life.
I am trying to get my head around 18, coming up.
I so miss some of the old days of a couple years ago.
Time didn't seem to go as fast then.
At least, that's what it seemed like...
This is my 300th post and exactly 3 years of blogging (as of today).
Time.
Is.a.crazy.thing.
I am trying to feel better right now.
I am trying to get my head around what's happening with my life.
I am trying to get my head around 18, coming up.
I so miss some of the old days of a couple years ago.
Time didn't seem to go as fast then.
At least, that's what it seemed like...
Saturday, May 23, 2009
amidst drugs
As I type this, I am trying to forget that I am missing Suites'n'Sweets tonight and am very, very sad to do so. I am pining a bit to be able to go which I cannot due to my current situation.
I am currently on 3 different drugs. One is a narcotic. Second is an anti-infection drug and the third is some combination of both of those but it does something else too.
Oh, I suppose I should mention why I cannot attend aforesaid event and why I am on 3 kinds of drugs *laughs softly* (as I cannot laugh loudly at present.) Yesterday I had 4 impacted wisdom teeth removed in the hospital under General Anesthetic. Oh yes, how delightful an event.
The bed they gave me to wait in before my surgery was right in front of the nurses station so it provided much entertainment (much appreciated). I did indeed have to wear one of those horriddd hospital gowns. (Good thing I wasn't trying to impress anyone, I would failed mesirably I think). They had to put an IV in me. It was the very first time I've ever had one of those and I was admittedly a tad nervous. They actually had to stick me 3 times. The vein wouldn't pop out of my hand so after they had attempted to put it in there, they finally tried my arm where it went straight in. Usually I'm not very good at all with needles and the like but apparently I "did very well". So then a 2 hour wait till my surgery time occured. Just after noon they finally came to get me. My sight was taken away (my glasses removed) and I was wheeled down the hall in my bed through those infamous swinging doors and into a cold extremely sterile room. Jody was one of the nurses attending to me alongside my doctor. Dr.G asked me how I was and I believe I told him "pretty good" (which I actually was, surprising myself.) The shifted me from my rolling bed to the surgery table (gulp) and strapped me down; arms, legs and head. They attached 3 monitors to me and the blood pressure cuff and as Jody talked about school I watched my anesthiest(sp?) hooka vial of go-to-sleep drugs to my IV. Then Jody placed an oxygen mask over my face and said "you'll be asleep in about 10 seconds or less" and that's the last thing I remember till I woke up in recovery about 1.5 hours later. I was VERY disoriented and I kinda tried to roll my head but there was something surrounding my entire head. (I found out later it was an large icepack "You're all finished sweetheart". So I kinda moaned and asked for ***friend***. The nice nurse told me that she was sorry but I could not have any visitors in recovery. Obviously I was not very intelligent in waking up from my forced sleep so I asked for ***another friend*** which was met with the same answer. (DUH! Kathleen!) I then forced my eyes open and realized I was back in my rolling bed, my nose hurt (A LOT) and I was in bed slot 88. WAIT... I rolled my eyes around the room, I was seeing double. I wasn't in bed slot 88, but 8. I mentioned how my nose hurt and was told that the oxygen mask had also been put down my nose (WHAT? REALLY?) I didn't feel so bad though as I gained more conciousness I was aware that I felt pretty good considering everything I had (supposedly) been through. After about 30 more minutes. Another nice nurse came and told me it was time to go back to the day surgery waiting area where I had been before. I was wheeled through another set of swinging doors and across the hall and into a different slot. Soon my lovely mother showed up and I was happy to see her. Then over the next 45ish minutes they took my vitals several times and finally anounced I could go home. After it took me a lot longer than normal to get into street clothes we left the hospital. I then spent the rest of the day in the lazy-boy chair and then my dad went and got my drugs from the pharmacist and then I felt even better and then that was the end.
Today I just continue to heal ( I think, I hope.) I do look a little like a chipmunk, but personally I think it's kinda cute. (better cute, then ugly, right?:P).
Hope you enjoyed the story and it didn't bore you too much.
I am currently on 3 different drugs. One is a narcotic. Second is an anti-infection drug and the third is some combination of both of those but it does something else too.
Oh, I suppose I should mention why I cannot attend aforesaid event and why I am on 3 kinds of drugs *laughs softly* (as I cannot laugh loudly at present.) Yesterday I had 4 impacted wisdom teeth removed in the hospital under General Anesthetic. Oh yes, how delightful an event.
The bed they gave me to wait in before my surgery was right in front of the nurses station so it provided much entertainment (much appreciated). I did indeed have to wear one of those horriddd hospital gowns. (Good thing I wasn't trying to impress anyone, I would failed mesirably I think). They had to put an IV in me. It was the very first time I've ever had one of those and I was admittedly a tad nervous. They actually had to stick me 3 times. The vein wouldn't pop out of my hand so after they had attempted to put it in there, they finally tried my arm where it went straight in. Usually I'm not very good at all with needles and the like but apparently I "did very well". So then a 2 hour wait till my surgery time occured. Just after noon they finally came to get me. My sight was taken away (my glasses removed) and I was wheeled down the hall in my bed through those infamous swinging doors and into a cold extremely sterile room. Jody was one of the nurses attending to me alongside my doctor. Dr.G asked me how I was and I believe I told him "pretty good" (which I actually was, surprising myself.) The shifted me from my rolling bed to the surgery table (gulp) and strapped me down; arms, legs and head. They attached 3 monitors to me and the blood pressure cuff and as Jody talked about school I watched my anesthiest(sp?) hooka vial of go-to-sleep drugs to my IV. Then Jody placed an oxygen mask over my face and said "you'll be asleep in about 10 seconds or less" and that's the last thing I remember till I woke up in recovery about 1.5 hours later. I was VERY disoriented and I kinda tried to roll my head but there was something surrounding my entire head. (I found out later it was an large icepack "You're all finished sweetheart". So I kinda moaned and asked for ***friend***. The nice nurse told me that she was sorry but I could not have any visitors in recovery. Obviously I was not very intelligent in waking up from my forced sleep so I asked for ***another friend*** which was met with the same answer. (DUH! Kathleen!) I then forced my eyes open and realized I was back in my rolling bed, my nose hurt (A LOT) and I was in bed slot 88. WAIT... I rolled my eyes around the room, I was seeing double. I wasn't in bed slot 88, but 8. I mentioned how my nose hurt and was told that the oxygen mask had also been put down my nose (WHAT? REALLY?) I didn't feel so bad though as I gained more conciousness I was aware that I felt pretty good considering everything I had (supposedly) been through. After about 30 more minutes. Another nice nurse came and told me it was time to go back to the day surgery waiting area where I had been before. I was wheeled through another set of swinging doors and across the hall and into a different slot. Soon my lovely mother showed up and I was happy to see her. Then over the next 45ish minutes they took my vitals several times and finally anounced I could go home. After it took me a lot longer than normal to get into street clothes we left the hospital. I then spent the rest of the day in the lazy-boy chair and then my dad went and got my drugs from the pharmacist and then I felt even better and then that was the end.
Today I just continue to heal ( I think, I hope.) I do look a little like a chipmunk, but personally I think it's kinda cute. (better cute, then ugly, right?:P).
Hope you enjoyed the story and it didn't bore you too much.
Saturday, May 16, 2009
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